Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
