So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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