why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
sex in a hospital.. check
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize