You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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