Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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