she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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