5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
