Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize