Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
