Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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