you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
