i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
