Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
