if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
You were trust falling into bushes
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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