Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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