I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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