never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I love how my cats smell like pot.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.