I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
