whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Randomize
