Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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