I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
