Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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