you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My pussy is not your playground.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
