He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize