I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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