quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
