whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize