i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
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ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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