theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
