i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize