Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize