how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
