Your tits are I can't wait for
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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