It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue