Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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