Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
