It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i was born a porn star she said
he puts the penis in happiness.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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