Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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