He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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