what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize