What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
You can't special order awesome
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
