Please, let me fuck your mom
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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