Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize