you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
