There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
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