I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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