you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
