So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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