found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Randomize