She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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