Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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