Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
